Physical Intimacy

 

Hello everyone, now you are probably wondering what I am going to share with y’all. This week I read about sexuality between two people. Meaning the physical intimacy that whether it be the type of intercourse that would be intended to make babies. Not about sexuality but how man and women experience having sex differently from each other. Now I read from Lauer & Lauer and as always, I will drop a link to this information. In Lauer’s article it asks the question “what is the most intense form of human intimacy?”. Now some people would say that sex is the most intimate thing for humans. Let me just insert my opinion here. I think that the most intimate form of human intimacy is more than just sex. I think sex can be a part of that intimacy, but I ultimately think that its marrying someone you love, and they love you. And when you share with your significant other your thoughts and feelings. Even the things that you wouldn’t tell most people. That’s my definition of going intimate with someone. Now in the reading we hear of a story of Hank who is going to get married. They asked him about him getting married. He said to them that he knew that it was going to be difficult because they don’t have a lot in common. They then followed up and asked, “what do you have in common?”. The answer might shock you like it did me. He answered, “we have great sex together”. It may come to no shock to y’all that they got a divorce within a year of the marriage. In the reading it said that “Great sex” does not make a happy marriage. Now we will look in the physical aspect of sex. So, the research is called “The Response Cycle”. The researchers said there are four stages of human sexual response. The first is excitement, plateau, orgasm, and resolution. In the reading they say that excitement is the physical or psychological stimulation. Now they say this in the reading, but I am just going to simplify it for y’all. That men reach orgasm a lot sooner than women. Also, that some women might take little bit longer to reach orgasm. Now a man named Erich Fromm said that sexual desire reflects the human need for love and union. Now I agree with this in the sense that I would love to have someone significant in my life. That almost everyone if not all people want to be loved. Now I do want to be physically intimate with someone but not at the expense of love. Of caring for that person and getting to know their character. Because true love is expressed when. You accept another person and share with them all of you. I think that the media does a really good job at having us believe it’s all about that instant gratification. But I believe that only created more heart break. What you need is an intimacy that isn’t just about the sex you have someone. It’s about having a connection with someone. An example of this is in the reading they share a story about a young man. His name is Charles, and he has tried to find meaningful connections (I am paraphrasing a lot in this blog). When he was in college for a couple of years. And he had a lot of sexual relations with women. But he started to notice that even though he was being fulfilled sexually. He wanted an intimacy connection with someone more than just the sexual. But it was hard for him to try to change his image around school because he was labeled as a “player”. So, he waited until he left college to pursue an intimate relationship without having sex. He even says that he wants a relationship to be emotionally connected with the person. I hope you guys read the article its got a lot of good stuff and talk to y’all next week.

Lauer & Lauer, Chapter 04.pdf    

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